Manipulative people

When people are toying with you to get stuff done, it’s a red flag. I think, it’s my gut feeling that helps, that I don’t fall prey to this behavior. Once, I gave in to this manipulation, to a romantic interest of mine, knowing I was being manipulated. But as for the others, I steer clear off them. 

One such incident that comes to mind was when I was used to get a free ride. I knew I was getting used! So let’s just say I used this person too. This person I was dating would call me to tell me how much she missed me and how she wanted to see me desperately. I would travel half way through the Bangalore traffic, keeping my work aside taking her around, shopping and then there would be no sign of her until she has another need. Since we were active in church, she would call me a day before church on a Saturday to flirt casually (this was before we dated), so I give her enough attention the next day. I was totally non existent all the other days of the week but come Saturday there was flirting and romance. 

But, I knew I was being manipulated and I did it all out of this possibility of being in love. There’s a give and take here. 

So here are some pointers. 

1. Watch what people do, NOT what they say. 

2. See what is in it for you. 

3. Stay away if they are just leading you on and there’s nothing in it for you. 

4. Be sensible and genuine. Maybe you can do this without expecting anything. (But that’s not me) 

5. Don’t be stupid, (especially when suddenly they want to meet you and you were never in touch)