Daddy!

“I missed my period!” she screamed.

“Oh my god, oh my god, Oh My God… what do I do?”

She snatched her phone and called him.

“Dude! I missed my period!”

He, half-asleep and entirely unbothered, pressed the phone to his ear. “Relax, it’ll show up. Maybe it’s stuck in traffic.”

“You don’t care, do you?! DUDE! This is serious!”

He yawned. “It’ll come, baby. Give it a day.”

“I could be pregnant, you idiot!”

That’s when his yawn froze mid-air, like a buffering video.

“…Wait. I’m gonna be a daddy?”

She was fuming. “I’m not ready for this!”

He blinked. “You think you’re not ready? I still live with my mom!”