Trust

Acrophobia, his stomach was queasy, legs gave in, bones freezing. His brain teased him, instructing him to jump, while his heart was just filled with the fear, fear of survival of course. He didn’t want to jump! It was just his heart and head driving him nuts. 

He closed his eyes, went to his happy place. Beach, bare footed not so solid ground, heart affirmed, “at least the waves can cushion the fall.” but the brain reasoned  “what if he drowned?” He suddenly remembered one drunk evening in Goa, he was singing and riding the waves fearlessly “Goodbye everybody I gotta go”, when a huge wave came crashing on him. Thankfully, his friend pulled him back into the shore. The happy place was suddenly not very comforting. 

He prayed for courage. Then he got his wisdom, he overheard a woman at a distance saying “God will keep putting you in these situations there’s no escape, you will have to face this” 

Trust, he had to trust the building he was on. It was built to last, it wouldn’t collapse. Then, he had to trust his own body, his anchoring feet to not trip and fall. His heart and head teased him with fleeting thoughts of “What if you fall?; What if you fly?” 

He felt it, his chest was heavy and he couldn’t breathe easily. His stomach twitched irregularly, chills down his spine, This was not a familiar feeling. He just laid there on the floor of his terrace, still afraid to fall. 

The truth was, no one trusted him.